Thursday Oldie: Existence by Abbi Glines

Before I start this (long) review, I would like to stress: this review does not come to invalidate your opinion of the book. You love it? that's wonderful. It's unfortunate, really, that I couldn't feel the same. And I explain in details exactly why I didn't feel so. So please, no hate. 

Existence by Abbi Glines 
Series: Existence #1
Source: Bought Kindle
Publisher: Indie
Original Post: Dec 4th, 2012
Age Genre: Young Adult

What happens when you're stalked by Death? You fall in love with him, of course.
Pagan Moore doesn't cheat Death, but instead, falls in love with him.
Seventeen year old Pagan Moore has seen souls her entire life. Once she realized the strangers she often saw walking through walls were not visible to anyone else, she started ignoring them. If she didn't let them know she could see them, then they left her alone. Until she stepped out of her car the first day of school and saw an incredibly sexy guy lounging on a picnic table, watching her with an amused smirk on his face. Problem is, she knows he's dead.
Not only does he not go away when she ignores him, but he does something none of the others have ever done. He speaks. Pagan is fascinated by the soul. What she doesn't realize is that her appointed time to die is drawing near and the wickedly beautiful soul she is falling in love with is not a soul at all.
He is Death and he's about to break all the rules.

I was literally surprised I survived this. 

Existence was the first book I truly hated. I don't hand one-stars easily. Me giving someone a one-star is basically me saying: "I applaud you for going through the process of writing an entire novel and getting it published, but there is literally nothing I liked about this book."

And usually, I can find a nugget or two of things to love to veer off that harsh assessment. In Existence, however, try as I may I couldn't.

The crux of the matter was Pagan, the MC. She is not a good character in my book, for many reasons:

a. She uses Leif - dates, kisses and messes around with him when she knows she's in love with Dank (more on that later), because he's "real". First, it makes you a horrible human being. Second, kissing another guy when you have a boyfriend also makes you a stinking cheater.

b. The Bella Syndrome - I hate it when girls turn desperate for a guy to the point they'll break into tiny pieces if he's gone. It's pathetic, in my eyes. We're stronger than that, damnit!
I can't reconcile the fact so many people hate New Moon yet love Existence, when they have the exact same character.

In accordance to those, you'll have to forgive me for gagging when the characters of this book claimed her "soul" was beautiful. Or that she's brave and strong, when every act she's committed pointed to her being weak, scared and needy.

The next in a long list of major turn-offs is the romance, which I'm sure comes as no surprise to you.

The romance is, to put simply - insta love. And insta love is never a satisfying romance. Pagan falls in love with a guy she knows nothing about, and there is no why, or when to it. The best I can figure out is she finds him sexy. Blah.

It felt like she fell in love with him at the snap of a finger. And not a healthy kind of love, either. He becomes the reason for her existence (see what I did there), without him - she is nothing, which I just can't endorse no matter what. Even if there was good reason for her to be madly in love with him (which, again, there isn't!)

And let's not forget Dank returning her feelings--

What did she ever do to earn his love, especially as the crux of the thing is how impossible it is for him to fall for a human. Ergo, the person who manages to accomplish that should be special.

She's special alright... (e)special(ly) annoying and hateful.

And if that's not enough, the showdown is one of the most disappointing things I've ever read of. Nothing actually happened!

SPOILER She chose the sacrifice herself so Dank could live but, wait, that doesn't work like that. So instead she chose to live so his sacrifice won't be for nothing. But, turns out, that's the biggest sacrifice she could've made because she sentenced herself to a pitiful existence without the meaning of her life (whom she'd known maybe two weeks, and knows nothing about aside for his sexiness.) Yes, so awful. Insert eye roll here, please.

It's just bull! But even stupider is how everyone claps her on the back and tells her how brave and strong she is. And as a reward...  he's back! yay! nay... END SPOILER

Shot. Me. Now.

The maybe only bright spot in this whole debacle is the last line of this book. It was surprising enough to make me consider for a millisecond to read the next book to find out what happens with it (than I laughed at myself). It was also too surprising, as in - there weren't any hints of what was coming. And I did look for them, because the summary for book two spoils the big secret.

As for the writing... I was not impressed. At all. Half the time, it felt like Glines was dragging things way too long (as can be demonstrated by Dank's song to Pagan. The song started really well, but it continued where I felt it should've ended verses ago, taking from the impact and beauty). And the speech sometimes felt completely fake and unnatural for young people.

The only thing I can say in defense of this book is that my major, AHHH I HATED YOU disappointment has to do with the summary. The summary is great on it's own--made me read the book, didn't it? But it also took from the whole story because it told us what Dank was. Maybe if I had to discover alongside Pagan who and what he was, it could've helped me identify with her, and than maybe I would've given the book closer to 2.5 stars. Not the best of ratings either, but not nearly as harsh as one-starring.

(also, notice the high usage of "maybe").

   Nitzan★

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Thursday Oldie: Angelfall by Susan Ee

Angelfall by Susan Ee
Series: Penryn & The End of Days #1
Source: Bought paperback
Publisher: Skyscape
Publication Date: August 28, 2012
Original Post: Jan 11, 2014
Age Genre: Young Adult

It's been six weeks since the angels of the apocalypse destroyed the world as we know it. Only pockets of humanity remain.
Savage street gangs rule the day while fear and superstition rule the night.
When angels fly away with a helpless girl, her seventeen-year-old sister Penryn will do anything to get her back...

Angelfall is one of these books. You know, the kind that takes over the reading community by storm? The kind everybody seems to unanimously love? Naturally, I was pumped up for this book. I wanted to be wowed by it. I wanted it to be the first Angel book that blew my mind all the way to mars.

For the most part, it wasn't. But there was a ton of epic shit going down there at the end, and just for that last 30% I'll be picking the second book up... probably the moment book three comes out, so I could binge read.

This book is not all puppies and rainbows. Unless we're talking about man-eating puppies and rainbows of blood, in which case, maybe it is. This book is bloody dark. Much darker than I expected (I always seem to forget how much crap dystopian worlds are capable of). It has death, and it has munching on body parts, and it has people (creatures? beings?) playing Frankenstein. Which is so not cool.

The conclusion? Don't read it at night. And if you do, make sure all the lights are on, so you'll at least be able to see the monsters coming.

The story is told from Penryn's point of view, as she navigates this angel ravaged world in her quest to find and save her little sister from the angels who kidnapped her. (Why are the angels destroying our world? No idea. Actually, no one seems to know. Which kind of sucks for us.)

I really liked Penryn as a main character - she was loyal and tough, hardened and strong... but the thing I actually liked most about her is how she is not looking to save the world. All she wants is her family in one piece, and even that is too much weight on her young shoulders.

Her journey companion is Raffe, an angel who had his wings cut off. They both want to get to the same place, for different reasons, so they decide to cooperate. And if on the way they discover the other is not so bad? That Raffe may be an angel - the creature ruining our world - but he's also gentle and caring? Loyal? Well, that's alright. And okay, he sometimes comes out too confident and condescending... but it really works for him.

Side note: the way Penryn says Raffe's name is pronounced (like Raw Feet) is actually a name we have here, in Israel. My sort-of grandpa (long story) is called Raffie, so that was fun to read of. 

Together Penryn and Raffe were actually... kind of awesome. They don't embark on an epic romantic relationship... yet... but boy do the sparks fly. And in the end... *le sigh* - Raffe is so sweet. The two of them are. I want them together, Susan Ee, and I even have theories and suggestions to make it happen! Email me! We can talk about them!

But admittedly, the first 70% of the book were just "okay" for me. They were mostly travel, and hiding, and running, and you know - stuff like that. It wasn't bad, but it wasn't anything amazing.

But those last 30%? Boy, the epicness. They were fabulous. And utterly heartbreaking, for so many different reasons. I didn't know one could snuff so much heartbreak into one end -it was kind of impressive, and completely depressing. Nothing good happened.The situation looks beyond hopeless... which makes me excited to see how Susan Ee gets them out of it. At least I hope she will... without killing one of my favorite main characters.

This book is also the epitome of mysterious and intriguing. So many things seem to happen backstage, and we have no idea why or how or what the bad guy's end game. I have so. many. damned. questions. And something tells me I'm not going to get any answers any time soon... *Sobs*

Lastly... sorry for all the cursing. This book just brings all the best out of me *wink*

Nitzan★

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Sabriel by Garth Nix

Sabriel by Garth Nix
Series: Abhorsen #1
Source: bought kindle copy
Publisher: HarperTeen
Publication Date: Oct 6th, 2009
Age Genre: Young Adult

Game of Thrones fans will love the New York Times bestselling Abhorsen series. Sabriel, the first installment in the trilogy, launched critically acclaimed author Garth Nix onto the fantasy scene as a rising star.
Since childhood, Sabriel has lived outside the walls of the Old Kingdom, away from the power of Free Magic, and away from the Dead who refuse to stay dead. But now her father, the Abhorson, is missing, and Sabriel must cross into that world to find him. With Mogget, whose feline form hides a powerful, perhaps malevolent spirit, and Touchstone, a young Charter Mage, Sabriel travels deep into the Old Kingdom. There she confronts an evil that threatens much more than her life and comes face-to-face with her own hidden destiny. . . .

I've read Sabriel for the first time somewhere at the first years of high-school, and it left such a big impression on me that the name stuck - among all the other books I've read at the time, Sabriel is the only one (that didn't have Harry Potter in the title) that I could easily name.

I realize now with this re-read that I remembered very few things of the book. I remembered Mogget (though not his name) and the final, final battle. I remembered a stone penis (which, turns out was actually a wooden penis, lol), probably because I felt so very "adult" at the time to read a book that actually had one. I remembered a guy coming to life from a statue, and a blooming love between the MC and him. I also remembered SPOILER he was a prince END SPOILER, and that Abhosren was her father.

But I didn't remember this book was about the Dead and and keeping the dead... dead. I didn't remember Abhorsen is a title, not just Sabriel's father. I didn't remember the many layers of the plot, or the evil dude, or anything of that sort.

And honestly, I still love this book. It's action filled, very interesting and I love this world - though I think I'd be far too scared to ever live in it. I loved Sabriel, and Mogget and Touchstone. (But, for god's name, what's his real name?!).

Sabriel is a strong heroine, even though she is very unprepared for being one. Moggat was both adorable and absolutely hilarious. Touchstone was serious and aloof but in the kind of way you could swoon after and make you wish you were the one to make him crack a smile.

But I've also noticed some of the weaker aspects of it now, under more cynical and mature eyes.

The romance... I love Touchstone and Sabriel together. Always have, always will. But I realized while reading this book again that I don't know why they love each other. They barely talked. So, yes. He was heroic, and she was heroic, and it definitely started to make them look at each other differently... but I felt like the book was missing the step between that attraction - to actual love.

Also, I hated where this book ended. I wanted to see the consequences of that aftermath, I wanted to see more about Sabriel and Touchstone and where both of them go from here - SPOILER how can he reclaim the throne that he never thought of as actually his? END SPOILER 

And, My god - how didn't I realize this was a part of a series when I read this the first time? But then, the next books are not about Sabriel so I think my curiosity will go unanswered. Damn.

On a side note, how cool is that that we're getting a forth book?

   Nitzan★

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review: a separate peace

book info:
ages: 14 and up
grades: 8 and up
on sale: now
copy from: Barnes and Noble
pages: 204

title: A Separate Peace
author: John Knowles
stars: 4

"Set at a boys’ boarding school in New England during the early years of World War II, A Separate Peace is a harrowing and luminous parable of the dark side of adolescence. Gene is a lonely, introverted intellectual. Phineas is a handsome, taunting, daredevil athlete. What happens between the two friends one summer, like the war itself, banishes the innocence of these boys and their world."

my thoughts:

When books are assigned for school readings, all my classmates automatically groan. Throughout the duration of reading it, they will constantly complain about how boring and useless it is, how crappy the book is. However, as I enjoy books, school reading is like a gift.

 I'm a writer, and I'm currently planning out a novel set in England. Naturally, discovering that this book is set in England (close to the time period I'm writing in as well!) piqued my interest. The story is about boys, at an all-boys school. This is rare, as most young adult novels are written about girls. 

 At first, it may seem like a boring book, with over five pages of description about the school. But the more further it goes, the more complex the story is. It's not immediately exciting, or strikingly provoking. It's that hidden kind of profoundness, that deep and sensual type of wisdom. If you've read it, Lord of the Flies seems similar to this one. The psychology of the friendship between these two unlikely protagonists, and how it affects the story, is very...unspoken. It's not a story that's told, it's a story that's understood.

My favourite quote (a theme)

"Nothing endures, not a tree, not love, not even a death by violence" (Knowles, 14)

 My classmates were shocked when I defended this book, when I told them it was great and I loved it. I recommend it to those who are willing to read through it. 

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